Our Hearts are Breaking

The call came this morning, the one we've dreaded. Our hopes had been raised all weekend and this week. Bailey had been his old self more than ever. He's loving the rice and beef diet. He's out chasing the bunnies. He's playing ball like he hasn't wanted to in weeks. Yet, the sad fact is that he has Lymphoma and we are looking at weeks to perhaps a couple of months with our beloved first pup.

I warned myself yesterday, when they called to say the tests were delayed because they wanted to do further testing. I hoped against hope they would tell me it was just being diligent because they hadn't found anything, but a little voice kept warning me.

That being said I'm grateful for this time of hope and enjoyment of his renewed energy, no matter how long it lasts. Even now it is hard to appreciate his renewed life when all I can focus on is losing him. This weekend I focused on loving him and enjoying his company. I appreciated what an amazing gift his life is to our family.

Right now all I can do is cry as I think about losing him and how horrible it will be not to find him constantly at my side when I need him. I want to go back to just loving him for how ever long I have him, but I can't stop the tears.

I know many of you have been there. My own Mom lost her dog to Lymphoma just this week. It is just hard to accept that Bailey won't be here for Thanksgiving and Christmas. That's how close a time we are looking at. Not years from now, but simply the next holiday Halloween is even questionable. He loves greeting the kids when they come for candy. That's a tough blow.

We ask for your continued prayers for Bailey and Katy. I'm not sure how she is going to deal with all of this. She and Bailey have always been close and it has already been causing her stress.